


Songs and Separation

by aphrosCartographer



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Sadstuck
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-29
Updated: 2015-03-29
Packaged: 2018-03-20 06:19:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,612
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3639993
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aphrosCartographer/pseuds/aphrosCartographer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Three years is a long time without your best girl by your side.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Songs and Separation

Dave sat on his bed, staring down at the instrument laying across his lap. He didn’t even know where to start. He buried his face in his hands and massaged his forehead, his glasses digging uncomfortably into his skin. They had been traveling on the ship for nearly a year and a half now. That was 500 days he had spent dicking around with Terezi and the Mayor in Can Town (which was still pretty sweet even though Terezi’s Town Hall now occupied 3/5 of the city). 500 days he had spent pestering Rose and Kanaya. 500 days of worrying about a crazed juggalo in their vents. 500 days of listening to Karkat whine about anything and everything. And it had been fine for the most part, if a bit tedious. But it was also 500 days without Jade. 500 days without the one person who could make him smile without even trying. To Dave, it felt like an eternity. 

When he had first heard that they would be spending three years apart, he took it in stride. Three years was No Big Deal. Hell, they would even get to miss the whole awkward middle school phase and skip straight to the much-prophesied greatness of the high school years. All he could think about was how he was going to John Hughes it up and be the type of guy who hangs around outside windows blaring music from a boombox. That would be hysterical. Jade would love that. When they met up, they would have so much to catch up on. He couldn’t wait to tell her about the construction of Can Town and the troll movies that Karkat made them watch. She would like Troll Will Smith. 

And then, slowly, he began to realize that three years is a long time. 

Seeing her in the dream bubbles didn’t help. Knowing that she had died in other timelines, that other versions of himself had _allowed_ her to die, gnawed at him. He knew he would _never_ let Jade die, no matter what, so why had she? He had asked one of the deceased Daves about it (he was pretty good at dealing with other dead Daves by now) and the boy responded with a shrug. He said that sometimes there was just nothing to be done. That fate was an unstoppable force. After that conversation, he quit visiting the bubbles. He claimed that the weird, empty eyes of the people in the bubbles unnerved him. 

Jade mentioned once in a conversation that she had always wanted a boy to play guitar and sing to her. She had seen the scene in a dream, and Dave had filed the fact away for future reference. Her dreams had an uncanny trend of coming true, and he was determined that he be the one to make this one a reality. After a few days on the ship, he had stumbled upon a guitar in a back corner of a small library while hunting for Can Town materials. So, he began teaching himself. He started practicing quietly every night after everyone else had gone to bed. At first, he had just played simple songs, “Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star” and shit like that. As he slowly gained confidence and found he was able to play much more difficult songs, he began writing his own music. He had written plenty of his raps down before, but this was different. This was for Jade. 

And now… now he couldn’t even bring himself to look at his guitar. It _hurt_. He wanted to stand up and smash it against the wall because maybe that would stop it from hurting him so much. But he couldn’t do that. He couldn’t shatter his last, flimsy connection to Jade. So he straightened his back and held the guitar close to his body in a way that had become familiar in the last 500 days. His calloused fingertips rested comfortably on the strings as he methodically tuned them. Satisfied that everything sounded right, he flipped open his small notebook and played through one of his older songs to warm up. The first few chords went smoothly, the familiar melody rising almost effortlessly from the strings. Then, as he opened his mouth to sing, he choked. He swallowed a few times, trying to rid himself of the lump in his throat, but it refused to go away. He set the guitar to one side of the bed and stared at the ceiling, refusing to let the tears come. 

But they did come. Tears always come. 

At first, the tears only slid silently down his cheeks, leaving shiny trails in their wake. Dave couldn’t remember the last time he cried, he wasn’t even sure he remembered how to until now. The quiet crying slowly escalated much to Dave’s alarm as he let out a sob. He buried his face in his hands, hoping to muffle the sound of his sobbing and prevent any outside condolences. His shoulders shook as his now silent sobs made his body tremble. He resisted the urge to blow his nose on his cape, choosing instead to wipe it across the back of his hand. He hated crying, _hated_ it. 

Suddenly, the door to his room slid open and Rose walked in, carrying a slim DVD case. 

“Dave? Everyone is downstairs getting ready for movie night…again. Did you want to-?” Dave hastily wiped his eyes with the back of his sleeve and closed his songbook. 

_Damn it Dave, why can’t you ever remember to lock your stupid door?_

He could practically hear the look of alarm on Rose’s face in her voice when she spoke. 

“Dave?! What’s the matter?” 

He tried to control the gasps that still wanted to come out as he adjusted his glasses. The last thing he needed was a psychoanalysis from Rose. Besides, she would probably just tease him about the whole thing and- 

“Dave…” 

He felt the bed shift slightly as she sat down next to him. He took a deep, shuddering breath as he prepared to explain himself but was cut off by Rose’s embrace. Her arms wrapped around him at a slightly awkward angle and tightened until he was sure he was going to explode. 

“R-Rose…?” 

“It’s okay, I promise I won’t tell Karkat.” 

He sniffed, “G-Gee thanks. Wouldn’t w-want him to know I’m all up and l-losin’ my shit.” 

Rose gently released her arms and used Dave’s shoulders to turn him around until he was facing her. She slowly reached for his glasses and, when Dave didn’t move his face away from her hands, she pulled them off before neatly folding them and setting them aside. Dave wiped his eyes again with the palm of his hand, unable to meet Rose’s steady gaze. 

“Stop looking at m-me like that.” 

Rose smiled and went cross-eyed, sticking her tongue out for added effect. “This better?” 

Dave rolled his eyes and huffed in pretend amusement. 

She frowned and looked at him in concern. “Come on Dave that always makes you cheer up.” 

“Not right now. I’m really just not in the mood for funny faces I guess.” He wiped his nose with the back of his hand and sniffed. 

“…do you want to talk about it?” 

_No, no because it just makes it worse._

He felt his lip start to tremble again. _Oh my god this sucks._

“Dave…? Is this about Jade?” 

He blinked in surprise and looked up at her. “How did you know?” 

She chuckled softly, “Dave, I’ve known you for forever. You’ve liked her for a long time. I can’t imagine what this…” she trailed off, looking for the right words, “what being separated from her like this feels like.” 

The tears started to roll down his face again. He tried to brush them off until Rose hugged him again, and he gratefully buried his face in her shoulder. She held him gently, combing her fingers through his hair softly while his sobs racked his body. Slowly, the sobs resided and Dave’s breathing returned to normal. He took a deep breath before he was able to speak. 

“Rose…?” 

“Yes?” 

“Do you… do you think I’ll ever get to see her again?” 

“…I think that’s part of the game Dave.” He felt her fingers continue to comb through his hair as she spoke, “We’ll all come back together soon. All of us. Me, you, John, and Jade. Shouldn’t this game end as it began? With all of us?” 

“I guess so. That sounds painfully melodramatic though.” He gradually pulled himself away from Rose, wiping the remaining moisture from his face. “Sorry you had to witness that… And sorry about your shirt… Oh god I’m so sorry.” 

Rose shook her head, “Dave you don’t have to apologize. I’m always here for you, okay? Three years is a long time, but we can do it. Together. Alright?” 

Dave nodded, “Alright.” 

“You okay? You want to come watch with us?” 

“I’m fine Rose. Nah, I don’t think I can stomach another predictable piece of Karkat’s favorite garbage. I’m going to go to bed. I’ll see you tomorrow.” He put his hands on his knees and stood up before offering his hand to Rose. She accepted and he pulled her to her feet. She picked up the movie case that was sitting on the foot of Dave’s bed and walked towards the door. She paused in the doorway and turned back. 

“Dave, we will all be together again soon. I promise.” 

“…Thanks, Rose.” 

She smiled at him and closed the door behind her. Dave walked back over to his bed and flopped down. 

“...I hope you’re right.”

**Author's Note:**

> Years in the future but not many:  
> http://www.mspaintadventures.com/?s=6&p=008587


End file.
